please pick me up with an explanation of why i shacked in a trailer with a guy who doesnt have a car.
She looks like an uncircumcised penis in a hat.
what made you think it was a good idea to trust the girl that hides tequila in her backpack?
Why does Corona taste like a burp?
Apparently i was peeing on things and marking my territory. I broke their light socket too. Needless to say im banned from their apartment.
he called you a drunk bob the builder and you proceeded to explain how you were going to build ramps throughout the house
I just won unlimited hot dogs for life. I'm so glad I smoked
This is no lauging matter. Huge cock equals great sex. Marriage to huge cock equals great life.
Just found a ramen cup in the stall and all of the showers running with no one in them. WHERE ARE YOU?
All i remember was you crying naked on the bathroom floor because you were cold. I got you a blanket and you kept kicking it off and crying because you were still cold.
If there was a saddle on his sack, she would ride it.
It's only slutty if you don't have his number. Unless there's a full moon. Then anything goes.
I am available for nakedness
I can't tell if my need for dick is more than my want to strangle him
The highlight of my week is I found some hetero porn I didn't completely hate. Branching out.
Randomize
