So I'm probably the first guy in history to tap out of a blowjob.
its really sad that i have to specifically make this a rule but, absolutely no lighting smoke bombs indoors at my birthday party.
whatever buzz i had immediately ended when i saw her run through a sliding glass door
I'm getting to the point of going up to a guy and saying "Hi I'm maggie and i can put my foot behind my head"... That desperate.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'm taking a spore imprint of the mushroom we found growing in our bathroom and sending a picture to ryan. he will then be able to tell if it's trip-worthy
Yes stubble LOOKS hot but factor in his shitty bj skills and I might as well have jacked off with apricot scrub
Grandma is giving me marriage advice again. On the plus side, she thinks I'm straight now.
He professed his love for me while I danced on a picnic table with a bottle of Absolut. I said thank you and walked away.
Oh ya, I forgot to tell you, last night I woke up to the sound of you peeing on the floor next to the fridge, didn't remember until now. Have fun at Dayton!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The problem with having a roommate is that you are forced to answer the age old question "Are you okay?"
I think I should just be a madame. Fuck it.
I'm just gonna post fliers on telephone poles like, "who wantsta be a hooooooe?!"
Long story short if you're going to get drunk on a sailboat at night leave your phone in the car.
then I ended up getting a lapdance from my TA...I love college.
We just fucked each other sober. #goteam
Guuuuurrrrrl! He ate the 🌮like it contained the Covid-19 vaccine!
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