Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
You remember correctly you did get a golf cart ride out but it wasnt because you were special. You were so smashed you were screaming tiger at random golfers in the middle of there backswing.
it's like a replay of two fridays ago...except not in a motel and i'm not having sex in the shower.
Yes, I am about to pass out on my beanbag with a mason jar of wine. Welcome to the south freshmen.
You were jumping on the trampoline and screaming that you couldn't feel the fire.
I yelled out look at all those hickeys. And then gave her boyfriend a high five
we found him passed out on the baseball field with two 40oz and wearing a tophat.
Where did he get the tophat?
when you come home i just want to let you know we are cats now. and we are out of eggs.
If I had 3 wishes one would for sure be a designated driver for life that gives hand jobs.
We went the strip club and out of no where the waitress brings him over a quesadilla and a jäger bomb and says your usual!! He swore he had never been there before
I'm eating Swedish fish out of my boobs and watching SOA.. There is no way your Tuesday night will be better than mine.
Are you on your way? Get your date and black out with me. Democracy's at stake.
First night of sleeping in the same bed, and she farted on me. I immediately excused myself and went home. Don't know if we're still together. Will update you.
It's not even 8:30a, wine glass is broken, there's sugar everywhere, and your mom just asked me what MILF means.
You kept calling yourself a spider monkey... Then ran to the bathroom to "prepare for the main event"
Randomize
