walking on gravel proved too much for her barefeet so she traded her bra for some guys sneakers.
Even though he is humpbacked he is really good in bed.
I decided that $2 and a kiss on the cheek was a great tip for the pizza girl. No one is REALLY sure how much I've have to drink.
it's like his penis is God's way of saying "sorry about his face"
Tonight was the second time that I've pretended like English was my 2nd language to avoid conversation w a creeper.
just watched a cripple ollie in his wheelchair to get on to the elevated floor in the bar. I. LOVE. WISCONSIN
Do you know why I have a burn shaped like a tiny spork?
I apparantly wanted to name her baby garbage
Just a warning... Flip, sip, or strip always ends in all participants being naked. Learning from experience.
I'm considering having a threesome with my friend just so I can sleep with his boyfriend and not feel guilty about it.
I was like can I please fuck your hips back into realignment
wrestling a boy for fruit? sounds suspiciously like foreplay...
Maybe I'm nitpicking, but that looked more like how one would jerk off an elephant than it did playing air guitar.
Seriously I'm dying. All my insides are fighting their way out of me. With light sabers and machetes.
One does not fall in love, one falls flat on the their face after leaving a bar
Randomize
