Third unemployed latin in my bed this week. I'm on a roll
I could have mohawked her pubes.
I mean, he was my book buddy in 1st grade. The kid taught me how to read, the least I could do was give him head.
And i didn't ask you to do that, You showed your penis at your own free will.
If I were there, I'd be putting a martini in you, via funnel if need be, and you would be doing this thing.
All three women i have fucked in the past week are here in the same bar. Gameface, go.
Gonna go for any of them?
Thursday night girl, but friday is watching and tuesday is serving us.
Where would I incorporate "your boyfriend fucked the shit out of me last night" before or after Merry Christmas bitch?
I thought I was invisible, then some guy flashed his high beams at me and I realized my lights weren't on...not invisible.
i was thinking shit as she was saying it. it was a sarcasm time loop
Multi-day drunkenness is to binge drinking as black diamonds are to skiing. They're tough and confusing and you hurt afterwards, but you did it and you probably got an alright story along the way.
Tonight I celebrated marriage equality by letting a girl I don't know kiss me at the club.
You're up at 3AM, right? I have a very important question.
You know the Wendy's on route 6, by Kohls? Do you know if it has a drive through?
Yes it does.
You tried to run away last night. The neighbors brought you back.you were in their hot tub again. This needs to stop
just turned another straight guy gay. Goddamn the church must hate me
He answered the door stark naked. When I called him on it he shrugged and said 'casual Friday ' Some boys can't be trusted to work from home.
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