I like you better when you drink
I like you better when I drink too
I ate one of your animal crackers. just one. ok four. but no frosting. ok frosting.
i just saw someone crawling up the stairs to the dorm while screaming "i have the best vagina!"
so when he was about to cum, he screamed his mother's name and continued to pray for forgiveness. wtf
I've taken to hiding pictures of us around his room so that he'll forever feel guilty for dumping me on Valentine's Day... And to potentially cock block any hook ups.
Omg considering I am covered in cake and probably cocaine that is the greatest news I have ever heard
THERE ARE ENTIRELY TOO MANY HOT UNDERAGE GIRLS HERE FOR THIS TO REMAIN LEGAL.
I just found pizaa roll in my hair. Already been to class today
Just promise me you wont die... or hook up with an old asian lady playing slots
Cant promise that last part. I won't die though
There should be a rule. If your dick is under 6 inches, you are not allowed to dress as Thor.
he congratulated me on my ability to grow long hair after pulling it to see if i had extensions
I was screaming out for people to gather the townsmen and the mayor so we could hang him
I think I broke my hip playing drunk ping pong
He's like a unicorn and I just wanna domesticate him
I'm slacking. We've been hooking up for months and I have yet to bang him while he's wearing the clown mask.
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