Listen the way I know if I'm drunk is if I have stage fright in the pisser if I do then I'm not drunk! And I definitely still do right now!
We were so bored at work tonight that we were in dry storage taking turns pouring the boxed wine we use for cooking into each others' mouths. I think I'm starting to understand the "problem" aspect of "drinking problem."
Boobs. All I remember is boobs.
And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
Some creeps at the festival started talking to me, so I told them I was going change my tampon. Worked like a charm.
how do you feel about lunch break shots ?
I'm having horrible flashbacks of being groped by Pauly Shore.
Take off that red sweater and wear my vagina as a facemask.
If it makes you feel any better, karma just served me up a big dose of fuck you.
remind to leave next time the words "tequila" and "challenge" are shouted
James is trying to butt-heads with a moose. I don't know whether I should stop him or just sit back and watch where this goes.
He snorted adderall on my table. I have a feeling he's not trying to buy me flowers
We have GOT to stop getting stoned and going out for expensive dinners.
He asked if we were going to take advantage of his drunken state. When we said no he tired to show us what we were missing out on. It was so sad it almost made him cute.
Just got high with dad
Correction: more high. He's sharing gummy bears with me.
Randomize
