but i really can't criticize. i blacked out waaaaaay ahead of schedule.
I would drag my balls through a mile of broken glass to eat pudding out of her anus
dude, I'm listening to "I believe I can fly", i'm high, and driving. this is so amazing.
She just took off her shirt and jumped in the kiddie pool. We're not leaving.
bro im too drunk for your spanish code words. did you fuck her or not.
You yelled "GET TO DA CHOPPA" and burst through her screen door and disappeared into the night. With the goose.
Of course he did. He is like the oprah winfrey for vaginas. Always giving that shit away.
I feel like jumping into a breast pit right now. Like the old school ball pits at mcdonalds.
The countdown is at hand. We are 15 days from so much Jameson that names will be forgotten. Prepare your liver now or severe projectile vomiting will be the theme of the night.
he ate me out like 4 times and told me that my vagina "was too much fun".
I also just told a guy I was available for counseling in case he needed to 'bang' things out. I've become a monster.
Need your help. Dad's drunk and trying to build a still in the basement.
NM he's asleep in a pile of towels. They need to ease people back into Hockey Night in Canada.
After last night I think its official. Deep down, we like alcohol more than we like women.
She's like the sister I never had that I want to bang.
Turns out my mom didn't really want to know I was in a new dimension last night from smoking so much.
Randomize
