Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
Giving the kids Children's Claritin and calling it candy.....Is it setting them up for drug abuse later?
she spent the whole night flailing her arms because "primates are the only species who can move their arms like that and we shouldn't waste it"
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
I know it was you because you're the only person I know who gets drunk and craves soup.
Soup is delicious
I think my hand is broken. But his nose definitely is
Didn't get the job. Searched for my references on FB and saw the pic of me weighing my head passed out.
I love how you sexted me before you told me happy birthday. Thank you.
Iron Man just asked me back to his place... Not sure I can handle this. Wish me luck.
i don't think fitbit tracks "flipping the fuck out" as activity.
Hey, YOU try working out drunk every night! Besides, I think at least one of those bruises is a hickey.
Oh man
I hooked up with the lead singer of the band at the wedding. I am so hungover.
She said my mask was creepy, took it off with her teeth, and proceeded to bite my neck. I love vampires.
You kept singing "your gonna lose that girl" to him right in front of her.. of course you got punched in the face.
I choose my mates solely based on size and ability. No cuddles. No sleep overs. Definitely no repeats.
Randomize
