So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
if i die, you can have my worn out liver and american apparel deep v's.sell the liver to a chinese restaurant
is not sure whether or not everyone at the club last night calling me a-easy is a good thing?
I understand. Hypothetically what should one do after throwing up in the shower?
And when I say "complete whore" I mean I could possibly make a shameful profit by wearing this.
i knew you were okay when you wanted to eat in the ambulance
When I sent you a text telling you to splash water on your face, you texted me back with 'Iwehre N qyull.'
sarah just described his penis as "like bong-girth." I'm gunna go for it.
I smell like icyhot and vodka... Heres to my pulled tendon.
We go out, we get drunk, we watch Star Wars, we pass out. What's wrong with this tradition?
He came over and watched the USA game with me, fucked me so good my toe cramped, then made my bed this morning before he left. Thank God for Army rangers
Yo this huge scar on my head from the car accident is truly a vag magnet. Probably because I'm telling people I was attacked by a mountain lion and killed it with my bare hands. But hey when life gives you lemons, you use them to get pussy
Last year you twerked on my Christmas tree and threw up all over the bathroom...in front of my parents. We should probably keep power hour to ONLY an hour this year
Being drunk at Chick-fil-A is a dystopian experience
They were shocked that I could handle my liquor so well. I'm half Irish and half Russian. This is what I'm made for
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