We had one of those mutual "I know your on a dating website, I won't tell if you won't" glances.
we sixty- nined on a tennis court.. not even drunk. you say insane. i say creative genius.
Correct me if I'm wrong, but I did not stop moving last night. If tequila gives me that extra push to have an active lifestyle, so be it.
Just coerced a Santa to buy me a handle. Tis the season.
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He refused my I'm sry gift of ANAL. That's how angry he was.
I'm spooning a three legged dog right now. Started drinking whiskey with Breakfast. Best part about being biracial is Irish cousins. Dog Pic Attahed
I fucked her and then she made me sleep on the floor next to her bed because she 'has a committment problem'
Woke up Christmas Eve morning with my face smelling like ballsack.. No regrets.
He recognized me by my ass from about 15 yards away. I must have a REALLY nice ass.
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You are like the only girl I know who tells their booty call to go find another girl just cause you want more sleep.
Well I think I made it pretty obvious I wasn't in to it. I was drinking a beer while he was going down in me
Then my perve supervisor asked about your vagina. And I was like nunya, but its glorious
Listen I took a family sized bottle of merlot to the face last night and there's an svu marathon on. Give me some time please.
Should I get the rainbow boxer breifs???
As your boyfriend, this is a level of gay that even I can't handle.
Last night I had a sex dream about Trudeau, he hasn't even been prime minister for 24 hours