Yea and his cousin visited from central and i fucked her i was texting him at work teasin him about it but sent it to his mom by accident
I can't wait to see her breast feed this thing
Just bought a pack of cigs...gas station guy informed me i took off my underwear and tried to pop a squat by the milk last night...
oh god...if the people that live above me killed themselves again then im gonna assume im the worst neighbor ever
I went to grab his drink and my hand grazed his dick. It was magical.
you kept introducing yourself to guys as "never going to happen"
Can I bring some rope too? It's not too early for bondage talk, is it?
He just sent me a picture of himself naked while cooking pancakes and he made the caption "bitchin' in the kitchen"
If you hear a loud thud and smell ozone, I may have been electrocuted.
Please don't think I'm weird for texting you this at 12:08 am but I just found another picture on the Internet where I think you can see his dick through whatever he's wearing
Dude did you see that video of yourself crying while bathing in vodka on YouTube?
Want to sleep. Also want to see Alex on MDMA doing really stupid shit. Choices...
Drugs and unwanted pregnancies are the only things that I'm good at. College comes in at a close third.
You took your pants and underwear off as soon as we got to Melissa's and just walked around the entire time like it was completely normal. We even ate pizza together with your vagina exposed. You're my hero.
Were we still high when we decided to break your leg?
Randomize