I told her I was pledging and she immediately proposed to give me head in the bathroom. i love how easy rushees are
There is a distinct lack of front teeth here.
He told me he wouldn't do any drunk sluts but me. I guess that's sort of a compliment...?
Dude before you bang that chick preheat the oven to 425 I wanna make a pizza for afties
I've also decided that the true test of whether or not you should marry a girl is if she will willingly blow you while you eat Oreos.
I mean you can't really blame him. He's named after whiskey and I don't get along with pants.
Well at one point he got ahold of my archery gear.. And I. Shit. You. Not. Sarah took an arrow to the knee.
You know you've got awesome issues when the main deciding factor of whether or not to cut your nails depends on nacho consumption in the near future
Thanks for bringing that stuff to help me feel better...you know, the water, the Gatorade, and the dick. You really are the best friend ever.
Then he said,"I love you like a sister I like to have sex with."
He is such a generous lover, I can look past the fact his name is fucking Bob.
anyways, do you want to make more embarrassing memories that im bound to remind you about later and laugh about?
Might call you tomorrow on a drunken hate filled rant, or just a normal hate filled rant, either way be ready.
We broke the bed while I was handcuffed to the headboard and let's just say that was a hard one to explain to the RA
The guy like flippppped out and made me pay $15 for a car wash. I thought I was being extremely courteous by making sure to puke outside the window
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