then they high fived as they party boyed me. I was a policewoman sandwhich. I love you halloween.
We just made a drinking game out of our chemistry review. This might explain my chemistry grade.
My mom and I are having a "yay I don't have herpes" shopping trip day
It was pathetic and I was covered in butter
She just told me she had a double jointed jaw and winked at me while eating her bananna. That's not possible right?
a guy just walked up to us....drank the rest of my beer....and said sorry for my loss before walking away.
Serious question...Is it possible to get a DUI on a kayak?
What part of "he tried to put his dick in my ear" did you not understand??
How interesting! I'm adding this to my list of things to discuss with you between fucks.
Why are there so many fucking Lambchop puppets hidden around my house?!
I did way too many drugs this past week for having a broken nose #commitment
When my beach tent arrives , I strongly suggest quitting our jobs and becoming homeless beach drunks
I just want to bone him one last time before he moves across the country with his new (average looking) girl friend.
He sent me a flaccid dick pic from the bathroom at the bar and he said I'm sorry it's not all hard and good looking. Props to him - I did ask for a pic.
ill give you some hints: blood, carnival, fog machine, happy meal.
Randomize
