Anthony wouldn't know good sex if it sat on his face
This just in: Jon Gosselin's address-The Alexandra. I bet if we showed up he'd date us.
Just found out you can rent the rollerena for 100 bucks and you can bring your own beer... when are you free this week?
I'm not sure what happened last night, but I have someone stored in my phone as 'Aftershock'
still wasted. at home depot . just threw up in one of the demo showers. not okay.
i've never seen someone face fit so perfectly in a toilet bowl
i got shots of sambuca dumped on my head last night. my bag still smells like licorice. making me nauseous.
it is a nice little reminder of the bruins dominance. if Vancouver had won, it would somehow smell of maple syrup.
wearing my old cheerleader outfit to the bar was a great way to get free drinks. i should do this more often
The bar would not accept my money. I have reached God status here
I just sustained a forearm injury dancing to salt n peppa in my kitchen. Fack. I pushed it real good.
You owe me beer. On another note, I made out with the ups guy at work today ....
My diet has been 80% Fun Dip this week, soooo, no. Not good.
There's just something so liberating about drinking a beer with no pants on
I was out of weed and my vibrator broke, so I'm now at Red Lobster.
After everything I’ve done… had sex with people off tinder, gone to clubs and bars, gone to hockey games…. I get Covid at GRANDMAS HOUSE
Randomize
