every time you feel disappointed with the red wings take a shot
his logic is that since hes already cheated on her w me its doesnt count
my ass hurt today after the party last night. I wnt to the doctors and they found a coin in a ziplock bag with a note from you. WHAT THE FUCK DID U DO TO ME???
: am i supposed to send the mass text 'merry christmas!' to my booty calls too?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She said she didn't want me watching her give me a bj, so she proceeded to make a "blowjob igloo" out of blankets...
I found the hair cut I want on the girl in the porno I'm watching. now really sure how to show my stylist.
she said i was like a little lamb and she felt bad for luring me into her den of sin. then she blew me.
Being a virgin isn't supposed to be this easy for you.
Summer bikini season begins today. I hereby declare the commencement of the 2013 HUNT FOR CUNT.
as your best friend, I hope we never outgrow 'I Just Got Laid' texts
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He made me choke him and call him Papi..so all in all a good night.
To this day, I regret not having sex in the bathroom
Basically all I do anymore is get stoned with my cats, and then we share goldfish.
Whenever someone said no you would yell "Die Motherfucker." Kind of like some twisted drinking game.
I kept telling you not to give them blowjobs, but you kept screaming back, "it's okay, we're friends on facebook!"
Had a dick customer and the words "eat my ass" slipped out. He proceeded to lick his lips and say present it. I think it's time I quit.
Randomize