he was like a christmas ornament you would hang on the back of the tree....not great but still made the cut.
So drunk can't even tell it's my own house. WOaoOw.
those are the first brownies ive had since i was 13 that didnt have weed in them.
I just found ouut you can get a DUI in a kayak. Fuck.
I just want a box on franzia all to myself. Just me, my wine, my tears, & my self loathing.
the "its better than getting an actual virus from an actual porn star" argument failed.
Just told my mom sparks is a health drink. Officially getting hammered on the way to the beach.
be proud. or at least amused. an 18 yr old and a 25 yr old at least makes my average hookup age this week the same as my age.
Woke up fully clothed in bed sleeping on my purse.....we're back!!!
I just rolled over in bed and felt a bump. Turns out it was a lil nug. Talk about being princess and the weed.
He stood me up.
I'm no sure if I should be pissed or proud that he finally grew a backbone.
I am taking a candle lit bath, blasting some tupac and smoking a fat bowl. This is how every night should end. Did you go take a piss in his car yet?
getting busted for public urination is like, a step above j-walking. you'll be fine
I am having telepathic thoughts with my cat. He loves me and wants me to blow his nose
i just turned on my printer and found 10 pounds of german chocolate inside. i think i found where you hid your candy last night
Randomize
