Can i not drive my cunt home
Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
And now we have yet another reason to never travel to Detroit
i don't know what the guinness world record is for longest time eating nothing but skittles but i'm going on six days
So this shipmate of mine somehow managed to throw up in his back pocket.
I'm not a pervert.. I just like to be naked...
Please talk me out of ordering the stripper pole for a dollar. Please.
Is it ironic that the girl with the horse face is also on the equestrian team?
6 margaritas later and free shots of tequila, i woke up with a fat lip and they said i blew my nose in a slice of bread
What kind of costume was that supposed to be??
I'm an orgasm trader!
just saw a guy snowshoeing to the liqour store
was it you?
...yes
He plays D&D and his dick should be carved out of marble. I think I'm in love.
I once broke a mans heart just to get laid by a premature ejaculator
I was so drunk I got motion sickness from sex.
The guy in the cage next to me is having phone sex. His girlfriend is in College Library. Why is my life ridiculous.
Randomize
