She tried to have sex with him but he quote unquote respected her
looks like were buying each other an abortion for our one year present...
I was wasted and lost so I called the cops and asked for directions. It seemed logical at the time
we should drop off a car at the police station before going out tonight so we can drive home in the morning
Why is it so hot and why are these the only pants in my life.
No I just rolled on the floor giggling. I think that's the equivalent to a post sex victory dance.
i may have given a gay guy with a mohawk my number last night that said... "you are straight" omg so glad a whole year til my next birthday... also i hit myself in the face with a car door. nice.
How frowned upon is it to take your vibrator into the tanning bed...because Operation: dripping wet is in full swing and I have a busy schedule
She swallowed the key to the cuffs, I've been having to explain the pink fuzz all morning.
we just smoked for like ten hours and got froyo. not a bad start to the weekend.
Are you the reason I woke up without pants?
I'm sitting in Madison square park surrounded by children thanking god I took emergency contraception
My hookup from last weekend apparently got arrested today... his roommate just tagged me on facebook asking for bail money.
How do you make a Facebook status saying how much you fucking hate yourself without being aggressive enough for people to worry about your safety
Cuz that's where I'm at
"WHAT IS THIS LESBIAN MADNESS"
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