Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
So I was watching the View and they were saying oral sex is the new goodnight kiss
So when are we having a sleepover?
i put that paper plate back in your cabinet because i ate all the ketchup off and you can't even tell. you're welcome.
Had to go to the urgent for a physical and I gave them my fake. Nurse was a sport though
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The 12 year old son winked and made eyes at me while his father fed me vodka gummy bears. Gameday yo
I would love a rich wife. Then I would be like a gym teacher or some shit. Bigfoot hunter maybe.
Only three months past my 21st and I'm done. So many life lessons in so little time.
His girlfriends signaled their approval by pulling me off of him and in turn making out with me. I think I will hang out with this group more often
You know we have no secrets, right? I mean, you saw me shitting in a gift bag drunk and naked on Christmas eve.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
when a dude sends me an unwanted dick pic I just send him a picture of a nicer one. A more photogenic one. A dick with a future.
definitely good. no good can come from sex in a very full public venue.
The Easter sex puns were too abundant
Because of you I'm damaged goods. I'm a fucking soup can and you dropped me.
Nxt time we drink that much, we'll have to hide the crayons. Crayola-ing a mural on the living room wall wasnt the brightest idea, but it sure is classy. Right?
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