Don't threaten to terrorize my ass hole unless you have to wherewithal to back it up
how to cook rice: 1. put random amount of rice and water in a pot 2. have sex on the kitchen floor. when you are done having sex the rice is ready
im at a party in sweatpants, slippers, and a basketball jersey from the eighth grade, 10 bucks says im still getting laid
whenever he goes down on me he looks at me and I just want to poke him in the eyes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The pride tent is doing free lube tastings. There is also a mechanical bull.
My goal for break? Fuck all my exes in reverse order.
It was like an alcohol war zone and you left a soldier behind.
I'm driving while wearing hulk hands
I gather from Facebook you got drunk last night and took semi naked pictures of yourself?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's seriously like a finger. But it's a cock. I don't know what to do. I feel like I fuck him to be polite.
My tongue is raw from licking all that salt with my tequila shots...happy cinco de mayo
I'm glad you found someone that both loves you and is cool doing coke off your tits. Proud of you.
Of course the sales lady was judging you, you bought a pregnancy test, ky jelly, diet pills and a 6 pack of red bull. Even i'm judging you.
Lunch?
Massage?
Spanking with handcuffs?
Apparently I told the mayor I want to be a trophy wife
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