we did anal to Party In The USA and he busted to Firefies .. felt like we were fucking in a middle school dance
This guy in church just had a prayer request to help him get through his hangover. He is my new hero.
Some guy just delivered flowers to my roommate cause he fell off a roof onto her at a party last night. I think they have a date tomorrow.
I just put up a picture on my dorm room wall of that ginger you hooked up with to remind myself that everyone makes mistakes
the laptop wouldn't balance on his lap. that's how well endowed he is.
You know how hard it is to jerk off in a bathtub with a dog staring at you?
Oh I already celebrated valentine's day. I stayed up until 4 AM listening to biggie, drinking rum, and caressing all my girl curves in front of the mirror. And then I came 3 times.
I'm in a bed full of sand, and also just took my contacts out. Whatever happened yesterday was great, I think.
It'd be easier to list the surfaces my ass hasn't been on.
TRY TO UNDERSTAND I HAVE MAGIC POWERS HOLY FUCKING SHIT
I just feel like if we dated, he'd just be crying the entire relationship
i showed up really high and was trying to not be,so in order to not seem high, i got plastered
and then you proceeded to throw soup at him for calling you a bitch...a CAN of soup...
fucking him is like fucking old faithful. you could set your watch by his orgasms.
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score onr for mom.
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