We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
one word: firstdatebathroomanal
if three guys were standing in front of you and they differed only in the hairiness of the groin who would you choose: smooth as a baby's bottom, the grass lands or the amazon jungle?
i think you're getting too neurotic about why she won't touch you.
It's my fault there's ramen coiled around his penis.
idk but i have you stored in my phone as 'guy with beard doing body shots'
We were having sex and his high flatmates stood outside his room playing the guitar and singing Somebody to Love by Justin Beiber. Weirdest night ever.
Hot freshmen.....hot freshmen chicks everywhere
You say this every welcome week, bro.
He was spooning with the dog when I came home. Now shes afriad to go near him. Should I ask?
Too bad pet owners lack respect for my training in ancient Buddhist and holistic rehab therapies.
I'm not sure the Buddhist consider pot brownies holistic rehab therapy
I'm drunk from drinking bourbon out of a "cupcake sippy cup" at the Denny's bar. What the fuck happened to the goals I had?
I woke up to my bra draped over his lamp and a huge bump on my head. apparently, I face planted while having sex in the shower..
Last night I went outside to our neighbors and asked them to put in money with me to get a hot tub for our patio. Niceeeee
It's only funny because he thinks you had sex with him to rob him.
I promised her before I left that I'd make good choices and then got drunk and fucked my best friend and her boyfriend.
She puked on the floor because she said she really liked to clean.
Randomize
