I like how you refer to peeing in the car as "super cute"
Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
Should I text him? Life is confusing when you actually like someone instead of just wanting to blow them.
We had break up sex twice. He said one was cause he had to say goodbye to both tits.
I've also hijacked your can opener. Sadly not for the same sexual reason as the muddler.
the water pistols in the freezer are full of voddka.
Do you remember trying to use a pencil, pen, and sunglasses as your second form of ID at the bar when they wouldn't let you in last night?
I'm having one of my monday morning walk of shame coffees if you care to join.
Just make it a game! Like 20 questions STD style.
Last thing I remember is whiskey shots. My roommate tells me we were there 15min before I decided to run home naked. And we live across from a police station.
I just gate-crahed a party and met a state senator, so I had an interesting afternoon jog.
When you left the bar, you did two cartwheels and a heel click and RAN ALL THE WAY HOME.
You came down the stairs dressed as winnie the pooh and kicking cups off the table and out of people's hands
unless you want this visit to have a different tone... more romantic, less molly in a hotel room
well we started off by chasing vodka with chocolate milk and ended up trying to befriend a crippled raccoon so that should tell you how our night went
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