Oh. Thats cool. Im not dating anyone right now. Sean gave me chlamydia from some GUY he fooled around with. Im being abstinent.
She asked me to cum on her. ON her. I think we're out of the friend zone
I just had one of those moments where i was really sad that i'll never get to be asian.
I'm guessing "whatever I can get" wasn't the reply the nurse wanted when asking what med I need. Oh, and asked for a cartoon band-aid.
The best part is that he made someone stop their workout to take pictures of him, specifically so he could put them on facebook. That is an unparalleled level of douchebaggery.
I'm drinking with 3 chicks and 1 gay dude. 100% chance I'm getting laid and 75% chance I'll enjoy it.
they're like a gay fantastic four
And I don't know what it is about weed making me want every episode of the real housewives of everywhere
Well be careful man. Be careful. Wear shoes in the house. Safety. Safety first, then teamwork.
The judge mental looks i am getting while looking at porn on my phone sitting in the urgent care waiting room is gonna get way worse when they find out im here to see if im pregnant
one renamed every person in my phone 'I lpvw tewqils', so it would really help me out if you could text me your name. Happy sunday!
So question... If I'm sexting with uncircumcised guy, do I have to add *then i gently pull your foreskin down*?
Well sort of got busted by a cop while having sex outside, so your call
Hope everything goes ok. If it makes you feel better, I straightened vomit into my hair and killed a bird earlier.
Don't worry about us we're making Mac and cheese
MAC AND CHEESE ABORTED, WE HAD FIRE
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