Riddle me this. What had unbelievable sex, and finally understands the meaning that things come better in pairs?
I hate you
Have you ever noticed that nowhere is the same thing as now here, i get my best ideas when i smoke
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
She threw her promise ring on the ground, that's when the freak came out.
You should've stopped drinking when you started asking people for bites of tequila.
i lost my airplane ticket and tried to board with a bar receipt in all the confusion. i have officially lost all brain cells in college.
Let's just not urinate on things that don't need to be urinated on
I brought a guy home then decided no. Took him back to the bar and said "I'm going to drop you where I found you. Have fun"
I saw Nicolas Cage's face in the moon. Those were good shrooms.
Now the circle is complete. Just interviewed a guy who was a higher up member of the team I worked for in my job before this place
I left her alone for a few minutes and she's already using a guy on his hands and knees as a chair while another guy is serving her margaritas.
I had sex in a panda mask the other night.
I can't believe my vagina just got wished happy new year
He threatened my life and my car because I called you. Are you sure you never slept with him ?
I SHOULD BE TERRIFIED OF HIS DRAGON DICK.
Randomize
