Your sister thinks she pees out of her clit. Did you have Sex Ed or Sunday School growing up?
Crisis Situation. How do you have that "we probably shouldn't make out tonight cause i've got an oral herpes outbreak coming on" conversation on a third date.
I may be the first guy in history to get dome while watching An Extremely Goofy Movie.
The look I see on guys faces when they realize my nipples are pierced remind me of when my mom used to come home from the grocery store and surprise me with poptarts.
It reminded me of the time my mother gave my Bailey's in my stocking when I was 14.
Finals week...the biggest cock block since your brother threatened me with a beer bottle at the bar.
its amazing there are so many photos of me and him separately, since most of that party time was spent sneaking away to fuck upstairs...
i've written a new chapter in the saga of unexpected dongs
Looking through my moms phone and find a pic if a dick. Scarred for life.
I'm ready to get married, then we can lie around watching anime and eating pizza while he rubs baby oil on me
The fact that you got a stranger guy to buy you a pizza off tinder makes me feel amazing
i asked my neighbor to open a bottle of vodka once and then we slept together
For a guy who came before his dick was out of his pants, he gave surprisingly good head.
Thank you for stroking my rage monster tonight.
i feel like every weekend turns into a giant blur of i dont want to know...
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