I can already tell this is gonna be one of those parties where we sit across the room and text about people.
So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
we walked in to her beating him with a broom while he was trying to sweep ramen into a box. there were packing peanuts everywhere.
Idk how hard you fucked her, but you managed to leave permanent ass prints on my tempurpedic mattress.
Second night spent with creepy guy. I either need to change his nickname or stop doing this.
Woke up and there was a kayak in the pool. Are you alive?
It was like stroking your vagina with a cloud.
My usual answer of have sex with it doesn't work in this situation
Had sex in a cemetery last night during a thunderstorm. I feel like my goth points have skyrocketed
I'm hungover laying in my moms bed watching Space Jam.. Adult Life..
So do you want to be the old guy picking up a girl in a mini skirt who may be slightly buzzed before noon from college, or shall i walk over?
the good news is that even if it's Alex's, I can still say it's Colin's, because the kid will come out ginger anyway!
who knew there'd be a plus side to your ginger fetish one day?
You just want to live out all your fuck fantasies with all these girls through me. I know your game. Well played sir.
She took her panties off, then farted in my general direction. I guess we're at that stage in our relationship.
you found yr lighter in yr cleavage and said so that's where you've been all my life
Randomize
