I'm like a rollypolly, I only open my legs up when I feel safe.
Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
i have a real life question, do ur boyfriends pretend to be vampires ever?
It just sucks seeing everyone get flowers but me...
yeah, but they die. it takes a while, but they die. just like all of these kids relationships will. tequila doesnt die. its a live in the moment thing... like a valentines day one night stand. so long run, tequila is the better gift.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
These guys are walking up and down the hallway yelling, "Yo, is this the floor with the unisex bathroom?"
Can we please stop calling your vagina the cave of wonders?
He did the "not my house dance." Apparently it involves spreading cereal on the floor and then grinding into the carpet in bare feet while singing "not my house" over and over and dancing.
I'm pretty sure you called me last night and screamed that she was force-feeding you a bagel.
a kid puked on the floor and instead of, you know, cleaning it they cut a square out of the carpet with a boxcutter and threw it outside
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She needs more friends. Or a second therapist.
Someone's vagina was extra sandy cause the left side of my bed feels like the beach.
my life could not get any worse. just saw my sister in a porno
I know the wedding is going to be a good time, I don't have to wear a bra with my dress
He was super adorable, like I wanna pinch his cheeks while I fuck him...
I made out with the hosts' boyfriend, infront of her, drank way too much, slept in my car and convinced everyone that I'm really a nice person. If that's not skilled lying, I don't know what is.
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