i get turned down more than a collar. where are the desperate bitches i need to crawl to them
We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
Can we progress our friendship to a point where i'm at least granted a blowjob allowance?
It was an igloo shaped doghouse, I was obligated to hotbox it
I'm sorry for coming into your work place and trying to smuggle you out in my purse.
well on a positive note i hear those vitamins you take while pregnant do wonders for your nails
I do. There's a bald headed guy whose kinda hot. I might rub his head. I've only had 2 beers
The last thing I remembered was laying in the bathtub fully clothed with the shower running while he was picking grilled cheese out of my hair. I couldn't figure out if i was more upset about being soaking wet or the fact that my grilled cheese was in my hair instead of my mouth.
I was so drugged up it was amazing, I felt like a dinosaur "because I enjoyed spinach, and I got apple juice and only dinosaurs get apple juice" according to me the day of, and last night I felt like a rocket ship
He was super stoned and then he compared doing meth to having anal sex and told me to "ride that cowboy." The cowboy being my ex.
I need to stop getting picked up at 3 am by my friends parents. This is the second time this week. I'm a grown man.
We were going to play manhunt in a strip club, calling it mancunt.
she doesn't even know what year it is. She just stumbles around life with a bottle of rum
I'm going to have to go for it. It's like Mt. Everest. It's large and unpredictable but I live for adventure and it's worth never coming back from. Mt. BigDick.
There is no rule that you can't be in a room with more than one dick that's been inside you.
Randomize
