I am pretty sure he just licked my hand while trying to sing goo goo dolls iris to me. Get me out of this state.
we'll penetrate his innocence with our dicks
I don't want to have to wonder if I'm draining my pasta in the same side of the sink you pissed in
we hotboxed my bathroom. with nine people and two dogs.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just shotgunned a beer alone in the bathroom...what do you expect from me
We are not on the "bring me breakfast" level. He's bringing me penis if I ask for breakfast too I'll just sound greedy
Just found the cutest bag of coke under my bed. I'm going to get fucked up and bleach the cat vomit out of my sheets.
It is becoming increasingly more likely that my entire halloween costume will be entirely composed of borrowed clothing from the two girls I'm hooking up
Kinda forgot to grab tampons. Mind if I run to my house to get one? I'd rather not turn my green skinny jeans Christmas colors
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
CONGRATULATIONS! You have won: pictures of my nipples!
This is what happens when wu tang raised you
Today I learned that when you lick a mans butthole, you get wined and dined at a nice french restaurant.
He sent me a picture of his dick as a snake, I'd say things are going great.
Idk how much of a virgin he is but I'm tryna find out.
Im going to the gym...covered in the Brazilians cum
And how is that different than any other weeknight in your world
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