dude, the reading rainbow guy was just talking to a HOLOGRAM
Are you sure you're not watching Star Trek?
wait... oh
So im at the gym and some guy has a tattoo of a hand doing the shocker... The douche bag bar has been raised yet again.
we need a dd. For wednesday. At lunch. What are we doing with our lives?
succeeding
You think they'd ask my permission before turning Pajamarama into an orgy. I saw too many of my friends dicks at once the door got kicked down.
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
You convinced us both to take shots of jack Daniels through our eyes.
A reason for us to be drunk all week National Singles Week
Considering the fact that everyone took the wrong jacket from that party, should we casually try to return the chalice and soccer ball we stole from last night?
I left your tip in your mailbox. Last night was amazing.
I'm going to three dry weddings this month. I'm flashing three dry weddings this month
You told the guy in Wawa you needed his hoagie for "a scavenger hunt" and then called him a "fuckstained Muggle" when he didn't give it to you. You are a delight.
I'm getting married
To pizza
My pizza delivery guy was so hot I was like omg please let this be the beginning of a porno
She ripped her shorts off and yelled "VAGINA TIME!"
did he think i wouldnt notice the naked girl in the backseat
Randomize
