You found a girl to hook up with at a gay bar?
No. His name was Paco. I didn't get it by choice. I never had a hickey before.
I swear if I see one more guy in a v-neck and fedora I'm going to punch someone in the balls. This is philly, you're not supposed to look like Ryan Cabrera
her parents were awake and in the next room. i think i deserve a big fucking medal for that orgasm.
We Started drinking at 8am and left the bar around 11pm....I hate ALL green things
She told me I had to leave by four. We fucked until six thirty and we are the champions played on the way home. Yeah god knew
Does he know anything about your personal life besides what you look like without clothes on?
Okay good. And who the fuck put a condom on my foot. That shit hurt
Just thought to myself "I should practice shotgunning a beer before Wednesday." I don't think my GPA is going to like this semester.
I was just handed a bible on my walk of shame....are you there god? its tequila tuesday's hangover
They actually said and I quote "it definitely looks like your knees went through some over usage"
This teachers last name is pfister and she did the fisting motion to help explain how to pronounce her name. This class might be good
SHE GRABBED MY FULLY ERECT DICK IN A BAR AND STUCK HER TONGUE DOWN MY THROAT AND I COULD NOT CLOSE
It's 4:30 AM and I just walked through a line of 10 deer without them freaking out. I am the campus deer king.
Should I be flattered that she mumbled "You're the king of my face" before passing out?
So if I run into you on the street, I'm supposed to just stop drop and suck your dick?
Randomize
