May have just accidentally purchased an iphone on Kate's credit card. This has potential to be bad.
just came on the shower curtain. sorry housekeeping.
I thought that since they were twins... they would be equally as good in bed
Just ate applesauce I laced with percocets for dinner. I'm pretty sure my grandmother does the same thing.
We've been here 3 hours and the only 1 word answer she didn't give was the drink order. Don't think I'm getting laid tonight
I can do it, this is my punishment and I will accept it, plus id like to see the look on peoples faces when I throw up on them
I'd appreciated it if you didn't lick my boyfriends face again. I'm askin nicely. Thank you.
If a "boob" guy and an "ass" guy are discussing which you are better qualified for....just let them
Sudue. BIG CUP LOTS OF NOMNOMD TUOSPY
From scraping the remnants from a coke bag at a lingerie party to meeting with an 80 year old man to discuss civil rights all in under 12 hours bizarrely feels like the epitome of my life
So I'm getting really old. I feel asleep for a booty call that I initiated. The struggle is real.
I'm going to give you the best blowjob of your life. And yes you can use my mom's printer.
I mean. I'm excited for the Seahawks too. I just love nachos.
Is it bad form to puke out of a dorm window to avoid looking bad in front of the people in your room?
How about from a sixth floor window?
Wtf did i hit my head on?
Tequila
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