I wish costco sold astroglide.
i wish my brain was less awake, and didn't try and picture what you were talking about.
Spaghetti and Car Bombs, good idea or what will end up on the bar in a few minutes?
this text is just filler to avoid a lull in the conversation
Keep in mind that he's 43, unemployed and living with his parents. There's really not much we could do to make his life worse.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Guy in our group took down a chick in a wheelchair last night.
Sex with him was like teaching a two year old how to work a machine gun
do not give him the "i just had sex cake" i repeat DO NOT give him the cake. things didn't go well
Why is there a frozen condom filled with water in my freezer?
Ok if you are accepting my apology, please continue to ignore me. If you are not, please fill out the brief survey that follows, to help me improve my people relations: a) your a bitch please leave me alone b)your crazy pls leave me alone c) I never cared ab u please leave me alone. D) all of the above e) all of the above but I wouldn't mind still fucking u. F) who are you again? Your answer will not b shared and will b used in accord. With the law. TY
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
if masturbating while stoned isn't called "weed whacking" then i just don't know how to live my life anymore
On NPR this morning, farmers are feeding weed to pigs. The result: pot bacon. Life just got better.
Senior week was like trying to herd cats. Very drunk cats.
I threw up in bed last night and tried cleaning it with oldspice and baby powder
Doing the walk of shame from the back of a Jeep to the porta potty it's parked next to while your dad watches is not what you want.
I'm gonna adopt her diet plan of secretly sleeping w a desperate ex... It combines excersise & loss of appetite due to guilt
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