So apparently I told him I was off to go "whore skipping" and I disappeared into the night skipping down the street. I know this because there's video.
The only thing I've had to eat today was the half eaten sausage biscuit I found on my chest when I woke up this morning.
It was like what a highfive between zeus and Jesus would sound like
im not an educated person. i just do things. and it works out in my favor
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have beard burns on my inner thighs. I'd say last night went pretty well.
90 In a 65. Talked my way out of it with the i have to poop story. i am the ticket jesus
you're not a real person. you're actually just like a box of wine that can talk
Pretty sure even her dog was surprised when I got that blow job.
Let's get one thing straight; we aren't in a relationship. We fuck and occasionally go to subway.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... So sensitive...
He started saying the pledge of allegiance so his boner would go down. Merica.
Let's drink lean at the 5 seconds of summer concert. Give the teens a glimpse into their future as dysfunctional adults holding desperately onto their youth. You in?
One of my pillows is missing but it's cool because there is a beef stick.
It's scary that my vibrator is a dangerous weapon. I want a new one.
Well, if you do die, I'll bedazzle your coffin.
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