guess who just trotted in eating her oats and wagging her penis
Her parents hate her and she's on like major lockdown. All her friends are in jail and she has massive pit stains. Dude... It doesn't get much worse than that.
so when am I gonna get some from you?
when you dick grows 3 inches
I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So can we just skip dinner and I'll just pay you for a blowjob?
Don't tempt me, I need beer money.
while you were getting the key to the dorm from the lobby i was giving a drunk monolog to the security camera about my life
I'm terrified to sleep next to her. Of course the sex will be fuckng awesome.
If we get out of this alive, I'm never going to a Denny's at 3 am again.
you made sure you came back for your bottle of vodka but didn't remember to take your shoes
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If we worried less about pouring champagne down stripper crack, we probably wouldn't skip so many meals.
Came home to butt plugs and dildos in the bathroom sink WTF
Spring cleaning
Hooked up with another cop last night. Think I am renaming my vagina "dispatch"
I'm so high I have morphed into the monopoly man. Or maybe the Pringles guy. I don't know but I have a mustach now
Access to a Target is paramount to my general happiness and self-worth.
eating pizza to get the taste of dick out my mouth wby
Randomize