meow
WTF. STOP SENDING ME ANIMAL NOISES. ITS FUCKING WEIRD.
She made me add her as a friend on fb before she got into my bed... I sense a stalker
I wish my period boobs were my regular boobs.
my fake id says im a 34 yr old russian lady ... how is this working
if that blanket by the dog bowl was your dog's "bed" then i apologize to bailey for having sex on it
We're sitting in his room writing songs about America. There's a verse about a dead dog. There's tequila everywhere.
Getting stoned at work has never been a good idea, but im always more than willing to give it another chance
Nothing like grinding all night with a hot ethnic guy dressed as a clown to help conquer your phobia. Halloween is fucked up.
Pretty sure the shower sex fucked up my hip alignment... im walking like im 104 today
Packing for college has become a game of where did I hide my sex toys.
you left your anal beads in the dishwasher
We need to feng shui this bitch.
I almost just opened my door to get my pizza butt ass naked
He can move his dick. Like on its own. WHY DID I NOT GIVE BLOWJOBS BEFORE?!
Nothing wrong with a little cat scratch fever. You have toys?
A few, plus a dildo molded from a porn star that I've always been too intimidated of to actually use, but it's the apocalypse, and momma didn't raise no quitter.
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