I'll just stay a virgin forever then
You still have to go anyway
Then I guess I'll have to start sleeping around
On blowjobs: "If you decide to go there, you finish the job. No complaining." I don't care if it sounds like she's talking about Iraq, I'm in love.
Ridin mah bike see you on the moon
i can't believe you just compared my dick to leprosy
you had me at cake vodka
He walked door to door asking if anyone needed to get laid. Surprisingly, that ended his drought
I ate vegetarian today, so I deserve a beer.That's my justification.
It's like you're the voice of my soul.
I don't think I will ever be as happy about anything as this man next to me on the bus eating Taco Bell.
I'm honestly just now recovering from saint Patrick's day.
I say this out of love and friendship. Eat ice cream not the d.
I'm having a hard time eating my sandwich knowing how many different buttholes my hands were in last night.
Also my roomates are going to be gone till sunday. Make correct decision here
Quit calling your parents your roomates
Only I would get an underage 24 hours before turning 21.
"hahahaha" is not a sufficient reply when I tell you my mother laughed at a joke about me giving blowjobs.
i woke up this morning from the best one night stand. i made the guy mickey mouse pancakes for breakfast and when i walked back into the bedroom he said "marry me"
Randomize