i can totally tell he's high. he's having a conversation with my dog.
if i wake u up at 5am tmrw by coming into ur room wearing nothing but my indiana jones hat and purple socks while singing 'courtesy of the red white + blue' will u be pleased or annoyed
keep in mind this isn't open to negotiation, i'm just trying to gauge ur reaction
we'll penetrate his innocence with our dicks
Just did lines off your face, congrats on getting in the magazine bro
Her vagina smelled like pancake batter. That's all you need to know.
I am drunk. Riding an elevator. You can smell the beer. Doctor on with me just smiling at me... He agrees, fuck cancer.
Just made a jeopardy bj game. Every question has 10-50 seconds on it and if he's right that's how many he gets.
Member that time when we got super drunk and had fun and fell in love
I remember it like it was tomorrow.
You threw my heel at her from across the street... And hit her in the back of the head so hard she face planted into the street. I need more friends like you.
This is the first time I'm hearing this information.
It's sitting in bleach right now. You will be the creepiest coolest dude in my book if you made a bracelet from my tooth.
I lost my bar virginty and made out with a dwarf. It was a good night
I was chasing disarono with Bacardi and watching ice cube movies. It would have been an epic birthday if I wasn't by myself and actually had some decent friends.. Hint. Asshole.
Trust no bitch in laser tag. Not a single one.
I made out with my moms boyfriends son last night. Thanksgiving is gonna be reeeal fun!
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
Randomize
