Women are like Alzheimers patiens. You can compliment them a million times in a day, but the next day is always a wash, you have to start all over.
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
And a psychic told me I was pregnant and I am just so over life right now.
Seriously... Things should be way more awkward... The entire female half of the bridal party INCLUDING THE BRIDE blew me in high school....
...Just between you and me I just did Olympic grade ribbon dancing with toilet paper in the bar bathroom.
If drawing me a picture of his dick in draw something is flirting then he is doing it wrong.
He walks in. We each have a tiki torch. We say, the tribe has spoken. We put his out and then stab him with it.
Is everyone touching their nose at me a sign that I should stop snorting vicodin off my phone in the bathroom at school?
I will not be held responsible for my vagina's poor judgment.
So I bring Danny back to the apartment for the first time and my roommate is curled up in the beanbag in the middle of the floor, wearing nothing but her uggs, high out of her mind and watching Harry potter... She offered us kettle corn.
He asked if he could come over tomorrow....
I feel like I could get pregnant watching Zac Efron do yard work in this movie
You're doing screenings before you set me up again- no child sized dicks allowed.
I don't work there anymore. If they had Prince themed dildo parties i never would have quit
Little does she know that you've out-sourced your conscience to a girl who doesn't even wear pants on a regular basis
I can't be held responsible for what I do for you after a blowjob like that.
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