pray for me tomorrow cause I have a midterm that I've mostly studied for by watching Bill Nye episodes on the subject...
i study at coffee shops because all these damn artsy people motivate me to work towards a real job.
So thanks to the xanax and vodka memory erasering combo i wake up only to reopen a picture of some very familiar balls
its a sex-hate relationship...no love involved
29 Frat Parties That Got Way Too Out Of Control
I've had cake for breakfast the past 3 days. You tell me how bikini season is going.
I'm going to listen to christmas music to trick my body into cooling off.
Woke up with pink eye in both my eyes. That's how the threesome went
its like accelerated beer pong for children.....we train champions young
Are you absolutely against sleeping in your car? Because i've done that before.
15 Ridiculous Ways Broke People Managed to Make a Buck
im about 40 per cent sure i invited the bouncer to our pajama party next weekend...
that ring i bought was worth the 6 bucks. wore it to the bar, told some girl i was recently divorced and wasnt ready to take it off. just got laid. THRICE.
I will take a blow job from a dude that kinda looks like a girl at this point
All three of us got laid last night. This is what is commonly referred to as the Trifuckta.
I'm still, like... really stoked about not having any STDs
Fun fact: the guy I banged last night. His middle name on his birth certificate is "Windstorm."