Some girl just toasted to friendship and love. I want to break her neck.
He actually believes he's not an alcoholic if he doesn't go to meetings.
A donut and a mojito for breakfast...Helloooooo Derby Wekkend!
drunk. just smoked a spliff with a 19yr old hungarian bike taxi driver and bonded over the difficulties of getting weed in a different country. idk y shit like this isnt in the study abroad info packets
These Attractive Criminals Got Modeling Contracts After Getting Arrested
So we reenacted men's olympic skeet shooting using roman candles and flattened beer cans. That's all
I don't care if he was in that porno. He looked like he knew what he was doing.
He wheeled me around walmart in a cart, and stole at least 30 dollars of junior mints fpr me. Best date ever.
You don't understand. This could be the last time I shave a star into my vag. Get over here.
I just had sex over my oven then high fived the guy. It's going to be a good year.
This Girl’s Unbelievable Catfish Story Will Make You Rethink Online Dating
Yes but funny for a 45 year old hell bent on reliving her college days by giving body shots and hand jobs. Not necessarily in that order
I'd like to thank you for ensuring I didn't die. Id also like to show you the most impressive bruise you will perhaps ever see
The only thing I had in my freezer before today was patron and cheese.
Lol yeah. Because I just woke him up to blow him for being hot.
Costco cheesecake and whisky. A night made in heaven
Why is there cereal literally EVERYWHERE?
It didn't follow directions.