smoked weed with Joakim Noah last night....if he was half as fast to the basket as he is to grab a joint from me we'd have another championship on our hands
the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
just bought a 30 and sold it for $2 a can to some dumb ass high school kids. now lets buy two and get really drunk
I know it may not be fiscally responsible to pregame fifty cent night, but I'm gonna go ahead and do it anyway.
Just spent the last of my lifesavings on (what i hope is enough of) alcohol. Hello summer.
And then she banged "the first Italian rapper"
I had fun this weekend too. According to Web MD, my symptoms say I had a miscarriage.
She just drank the vanilla extract. Again. AGAIN. No one should be that eager to get drunk.
The bouncer yelled at him for poking at the guy selling roses, I think it's time to leave.
White grape blunt wraps are like the equivalent of a glass of wine in a tux.
So he ended up throwing a watermelon that he stole from the cafeteria saying "if i cant have it no one can" of the 5th floor.
Sitting in my car feasting on the spoils of Taco Bell as Donna Lewis croons "I love you, always forever." A more perfect moment will never exist.
How do you tell a woman that you are seeing that the scars on your back are from her awesome-in-bed little sister?
Typically a man doesn't buy a woman a drink in hopes of her laughing at his penis, but no one said I was normal.
I know right. I don't even want to have sex today. I did anyway but that's besides the point.
Randomize
