im never drinking mad dog again and i have your belt.
don't get me wrong, i like my boss a lot, but not enough to not bang his daughter
she was sure she was an eel. She spent 40 minutes sliterhing on the floor to get to her room
if women knew the size of my dick, theyd be much more receptive to my sloppy drunken advances
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just crossed the line from casual pregrame to public intoxication. Shotgunning in a bus shelter.
Leave it to us to have a family reunion in a bar bathroom
Do you remember Kelly my alter personality? She talked like a man and would sing amazing grace?
Would you have sex with a guy wearing a Batman mask?
It's all hypothetical, I don't have a Batman mask... yet...
work has become about six times more interesting since i started fucking my boss.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just had an hour long talk with a woman, turns out she's the mom of the guy i lost my virginity to. Even better his dog was also present.. Meeting the family at its best?
She fell off the bed and giggled until she passed out naked. It was really weird.
Probably not gonna date her.
You stopped making out with some rando guy to tell him you weren't sure about your sexuality then proceeded to follow me down the street to make out with me
He brought me hungover chipotle knowing full well he wasn't getting a blow job. I think he may be too in love with me.
I just left and he walked me out and went call me if you're ever... Eh... Whatever. And walked away.
We were driving past a farm when he screamed at me to stop the car, then he jumped out and tried to ride a cow.
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