You don't get off work for this? I feel genuinely bad for you.
I'll have a beer when I get into the office. Yes, I hide beer in my work frige.
there are some really hot girls on the bus. i want to lips them
got some bad news about ur virginity. she didnt make it thru the night
She needs to learn what's it like to have sex with someone and regret it the next day.
Drunk, high, and in a taco costume. Wish you were here.
just looked at his mug shot... not really my type
wanna get hammered and throw tomatoes at the people standing in line for the midnight showing of harry potter and yell whichcraft is evil
I've never seen a grown man cry so much after getting jerked off by a stripper. I say it's the best $600 he ever spent.
Puked up what appears to be battery acid next to the treadmill. Everyone noticed.
I woke up this morning with a sharpie tramp stamp. Pretty sure it's a picture of a squirrel.
i swear i just dislocated a hip staying still
This girl looks like an elf and is obviously on coke. I want to be her.
its gotten to the point where if her hand isn't on my butt i think we're in a fight
We both know we're cheating on one another. But our side pieces aren't as kinky as us...so yeah, we're still together. This is a fucked up relationship.
FYI brushing your teeth & taking off your makeup does not erase the shame from the night before
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