so my bro's bff came over...we had an awkward "yeah we fucked and can fuck later, but let's just pretend it didn't happen in front of the family" hug.
haha you were like: "I don't want to uh pressure you.." as you took your own shirt off
i just funneled a beer through a mask n snorkel.. can you check that off my bucket list..
The man at the Honda dealership told me I smell like vodka and probably shouldn't be driving.
These 33 Eskimo Brothers Boinked The Same Person And Couldn’t Be More Proud
He asked me to grab his balls and yell "thats a spicy meat-a-ball" Last time I do requests.
at least if we puke, we will be surrounded by beautiful, non-judgemental trees.
I miss the good ol' days when we would yell at strangers from your balcony while wearing our mexican ponchos in the middle of the day.
what ever happened to our old dealer?
Found our threesome girl. She says I'm pretty. She doesn't know I'm pregnant. Yet. Think we can pull it off?
please come upstairs a drunk asian is lying down n the middle of my room and i don't know him
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
I thought i lost my bra, but when i went back to help clean it was hanging up on the wall
Just a heads up... Don't get high and attempt to do your own taxes
Do you remember doing synchronized hip thrusts to Michael Jackson? Probably one of my favorite parts of the night
Packing a mid day bowl in the Sonic parking lot. Have I gone too stoner?
Drinking from the bottle. In bed. Making dinosaur noises. Oh man.
They way I see it is I've wasted 7 years of having these glorious tits. I only have about 3 good years left before idk kids or just gravity takes over and they don't look this nice so it's basically open season.