That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
I am too high to leave where I am...And they are listening to Stained. This is my living hell.
A 21st bday and NYE should be illegal to have in the same week...
I save people's lives for a living, but I want to ruin his marriage.
Eating Doritos is not nearly as enjoyable when I'm not drunkenly feeding them to peacocks.
Sorry I didn't pick up for your booty call. I usually am asleep at 4:00 on Thursdays. Like a normal person.
I've reached the point in my life where I desire cats more than men
drinking ice water after you brush your teeth, is like Antarctica blowing a load into your mouth.
There two guys dressed as FEMA workers with jump-suits that say "Post-Disaster Breast Examination Division"
Am I not being subtle enough by giving him a rainbow striped bong, during PRIDE MONTH?
Well I met my booty call's parents by accident, so that happened.
returning from a 6am booty call in 2 feet of snow on a Tuesday is a bold new kind of low for me
I used an explanation of Walking Marriages in the Mosuo Culture to successfully negotiate an open relationship. That Anthropology degree is finally starting to pay off.
You sent me a pic of you peeing in two separate directions
and like half a dozen dick pics
I had a threesome with my hot neighbor and his GF and by threesome I mean I heard them getting it on in their apartment and I was in my apartment with a vibrator
and I may have moaned his name loud enough that they heard me because now he won’t make eye contact
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