I'm drive I can fine osifer
I told my rommate that he was pissing on his bed. He said "ok man" and took a step backwards and continued. He then went back to bed.
Girl next to me just said "as a guy I used to sweat but not I don't. it's awesome" Oh. My. God.
So High I just made Cadbury Coffee. I don't know what it is yet, but it involves Cadbury Eggs and coffee.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm cooking a can of baked beans on the baseboard heater. It is too early in the semester to be this poor.
I'm going as Jenn Sterger if she answered Favre's calls and ended up in a trash can. If I don't get laid tonight I'm going to be pissed
My warmest regards to the fish in that koi pond I puked in.
Honestly, it's his loss. He went for the free sample when he could've gotten the whole package, babes.
does that make me the free sample at the grocery store he didn't like enough to buy...? yeah, that advice didn't help, but thanks.
A big dick and how quickly they respond to snapchat is all I look for in a guy
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm not entirely sure that the guy that just texted me is not on drugs right now. I'm also not entirely sure that he isn't about to be incarcerated.
I'm standing up, for my all my brothers and sisters, and fighting against whiskey dick.
He took a picture of me to show his boss why he was late...Is that a compliment or not?
And you are going to be so turned on by my batman skills later
Its my nipple ring piercing anniversary. We need to celebrate.
Im crying watching 9/11 footage eating spray can cheese in my pajamas.
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