I'm in your bed right now
Okay meet you there give me 10
Don't think you can make me leave either
Give me ten I ha e to be ******'s wingman I want you
i woke up to find out i shared my bed with a full, open can of natty light last night and didnt spill it. then i drank it for breakfast.
you know by doing this we are using dad as a drug mule right?
Yea, i was tied up and blindfolded. And someone was throwing chicken nuggets at my face.
its before 9am and ive already had to dip my dick and balls in a glass of milk. probably isnt a good sign for how today is going to go.
we left when one of the guys tried to stick himself with an IV that he found
He snapchatted me his dick and he's circumcised....BRB going to hug his Mom
I spent half an hours grinding with a drunk Harry Potter cosplayer at the con rave. Pretty sure I felt his wand.
Give me a minute. I'm trying to buy moonshine from a railroad worker named "Cowboy."
I was thinking we could get together and exchange gifts, and by gifts I mean orgasms.
I ate all your munchie Mac and Cheese cause you left me on the lawn. If you don't want it to happen gain, drag my drunk ass inside next time
I wonder how vigorously I can jack off in a one person tent without being noticed???
If only he'd realize the fondness I have for his genitals.
We could have fun in a cardboard box. Think of the damage we could do at an amusement park!
she bought my drinks all night, made me breakfast in the morning, and let me use her expensive hair products before i left. best one night stand ever.
Randomize