so i was creeping on him today and there was like nothing new except he became a fan of getting dome
i wish i could be like. "i like giving dome, lets be friends"
new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
My mom just called and reminded me not to throw up in any cabs tonight. Happy St. Patty's Day.
It's cute how he thinks we're going to have sex again
well isn't that the pot calling the kettle a make out whore
Just fucking put out. It'll be a good lay, promise. Stop being a prude. Damn it. A boy is trying to put his penis in you. APPRECIATE IT.
I'm driving up the street and can't tell if my ears are actually about to pop or not.
A solid 8.5 on the baked meter, I need to stop.
Omg do you remember last night you kept pointing to your vag asking who wants to play this like a fiddle hahaha
if the furniture in my bedroom wasn't shape shifting... this would be a different story.
Last night was so embarrassing. I got like almost blackout drunk and threw up in my hand and then blamed it on someone else.
She's on her period. You don't know what fear is.
Considering all of my stomach contents ended up in my center console, I'm a bit peckish.
I’m mid 4sum and you’re sending me photos of your cat. We had very different evenings.
I don't know how to explain to you that you tried to recreate the bit from the Dana Carvey show where a guy dressed as Bill Clinton breastfeeds a bunch of puppies
Randomize
