Dude WTF? His teammate just started talkin to me on fb! Am I walking around with a "I like to f**k gators" on my forehead?
No, it just says ur easy
At what point did I decide it would be a good idea to fill my contact case with vodka
Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
how do i tell her that i need alcohol to fuck her but at the same time i cant get a hard on with alcohol.
This exeeds the amount of high I planned on being.
1 in 5 deaths i nrussia is alcohol related. GO MOTHERLAND
Saw on the news tonight that Hamilton county's syphilis rate is 9x the national average...use protection!
Thanks, mom.
official rule: if your drunk, it doesn't count
then nothing in my life counts
I feel like the way dolphins mate would be the approach that a guy would have to use in order for you to sleep with them
Munching saltines, sippin Gatorade, and trying not to get eaten by this small horse
somehow a ride to walgreens turned into a threesome.
i just got carded for condoms. wtf.....this is new. isnt safe sex a good thing?
I peed in front of kids, unfortunately
You ran up a $300 bar bill on his card and he didn't have you arrested, be grateful and move on.
Should I put the spider I likely swallowed in my sleep into my calorie tracker?
Randomize
